I am not getting used to NOT being considered a youth anymore. All my friends are younger than me. I have just gotten over a 9 year relationship with a very nice lad, it just wasnt working. I want to live on a farm, he wants to stay in town. So the story goes: I went well over a year being single, with no sex, no orgasims etc.. so out of sheer frustration i decided to go to a bathhouse to get a royal fuck. I spent the whole time passing this absolutely gorgeous malato boy condoms to be used on me. Turns out he wasnt putting them on. I left the place satisfied of my great pounding shag. Two weeks later i started feeling very sick - muscle pains, head aches and night sweats that soaked right through to the mattress. Being the smart and dillegent person i am, i did some research and ordered a blood test. Two weeks later i recieved my news: The Most Safe Gay Guy Got HIV. My life has been turned upsidedown. I went from having slim odds of meeting someone in my small town to being the guy with even slimmer odds because everyone will be afraid of getting infected. BUT I WANT EVERYONE TO KNOW, THAT BEING ON MEDICATION LOWERS THE CHANCE OF RECIEVING HIV BY 95%, and wearing a good condom lowers it by a further percentage... to the point that if i play safe, YOU WILL BE SAFE TOO. I hope i can find friends, and maybe love, in someone on this site or others. PLEASE, IF YOU KNOW SOMEONE THAT CAN GET PAST MY BEING SICK, PLEASE HOOK US UP! But at the moment i couldnt feel more lonely. i just want someone to hold me close!